Once again we have been left without broadband as a result of the storms, I can’t say it’s that bad for me because since I came home on Tuesday I have been mainly sleeping! I am now in the doctors surgery waiting for my checkup and taking advantage of their wifi!!
There is so much I would like to talk about from my observations while I was in hospital, I am struggling again with my energy at the moment but hope to come back to it at some point in time.
The most important thing is that I am getting so much better every day and I know now that I will make a full recovery I did however have some dark moments in the hospital.
In my optimism I had left myself completely unprepared for another setback, particularly one that came out of nowhere. When I had that initial pain a week ago it didn’t even cross my mind that it could be a blood clot or even an infection. I was sure it was just muscular where I had been sitting for too long or at a funny angle, you know, just how anyone would in the days where cancer was just something a bit scary that you hoped you would never have to deal with.
The thing about being in hospital is that it takes away all the distractions of everyday life and home and leaves you with far too much time with your own thoughts and, especially when you are in the company of people having to imminently face their own mortality; your own thoughts are naturally drawn to that. The thing is that whilst I know I have cancer that is incurable so it will most probably be my cause of death, we still have no idea how I will die, just like everybody else. It’s a different perspective to be looking at life from and one that I haven’t got my head around just yet. I will keep on pondering it here and may ultimately figure it out but somehow I doubt it ?
I hope you have a fabulous weekend
Lots of love Mand xxx
Thought-provoking post Mand … no more philosophy books for you! 🙂 I’m glad you’re home and feeling a bit better and hope the broadband is back soon.
Hi Mand, so glad you are feeling better and recovering from the infection. I hope the rest of the ranch is ok and it’s just the broadband that is down! That Barney nearly blew Willows trampoline away! Lots of love to you all xxx
Hope you have a lovely weekend and continue to get better and better! Hopefully with the usual distractions! 🙂
Your thoughts above makes me think of how it’s often said about children who are going through difficult times that they are having to grow up to fast. You’re having to get old and wise too fast! But we’re all here with you every minute of every day! Never forget that, even when it’s dark.
xxx
Hi mand
It’s the first time I have been on this site, I didn’t know about it.
As I read I hear your “sqeak” voice and how positive you have always been no matter what the challenge you face. I really am overwhelmed, but it’s so satisfying to read that you are getting better despite setbacks.
As I am away working this enlightens me with glee and feel proud of your determination.
Keep going Amanda, with love
Gary
Hope you have a good weekend catching up on sleep and relaxing with the boys! Sending positive thoughts your way XX
Hi Mand, wrap up warm and rest up. Your energy will come back, a couple of good nights sleep and you will be back on it ? Penny xxx