Month: April 2016

I find it difficult to believe that it is four weeks since my last bone treatment so here I am again at the hospital, plugged in and being pumped full of my ‘Wolverine’ bone strengthening treatment!

I have just realised that it is almost 3 weeks since my last post.  We should take that as a good sign!  I have been busy getting back into work and spending time with family and friends.

The most notable achievements are:

• Working three mornings a week from home (I did one full day but it was a bit much so I have slowed down ?)
• Regularly walking out with Dude
• Phil has been busy getting the vegetable seeds started for the veg garden and we have been watching them sprout!
• A trip to stay with Bryony, Chris and Amelie in Leeds with Chris to buy an outfit for Bryony’s wedding in June (Dad came to Leeds too but not shopping! ?)
• A lovely extra long weekend visit from Mum and Richie
• Lunch out with two friends in Beccles (I drove there myself, on my own!!)
• Almost eliminated the afternoon naps

Finally, today I have signed up for a HOPE course at the Big C starting in a couple of weeks.

Despite my outward gregariousness, I am struggling a bit mentally with creating and adapting to my ‘new normal’ and this course looks to be just the ticket!

I will, of course, let you know how I get on ?

Talk to you soon

Lots of love Mand xxx

 

 

 

It was on this day, one year ago that we received my diagnosis of stage 4 breast cancer.  In many ways it seems like yesterday, in some ways a whole lifetime ago.

I have had some bad days but a lot more good ones.

I have felt terrible and I have felt invincible.

I have discovered my inner unicorn.

If I’m totally honest, it doesn’t seem any more real than it did on that morning.  If I really think about it my insides turn into scurrying creatures and my head spins like a washing machine on a spin cycle and it feels just as fresh as it did then.

I have seen and heard having cancer described as a roller coaster ride a lot and I don’t have a better way to express it.  The good things are so much better than they were before and the bad things are much more scary.  It feels like nothing happens and yet it feels like being bombarded with random stuff just when you think you’ve got to grips with it all.

I have been humbled by the amount of love and support I have received from all directions, from all phases of my life and from all parts of the world.

Thank you for being there with us.

Talk to you soon

Lots of love Mand xxx

I have always denied being obsessed with my hair.  I am however aware that I do talk about it a lot!  The thing is, whilst everything is going on in my body, it’s nothing that can be seen or touched, my hair on the other hand has been hugely impacted and is glaringly obvious which makes it an easy topic of conversation. Add to this the fact that I have never been really precious about my hair (I have close relatives who would regularly cry for hours after a visit to the hairdresser!) and it makes something easy to make fun of and talk about.

So I’m going to talk about it again!

As I have said before, it is growing back curly. This delights me, I have wanted curls or at the very least waves in my hair since I can remember.  When I was 16, in the 5th year at school, the year I did my ‘O’ levels (yes, the real exams before GCSEs!), I managed to convince my parents it would be a good idea to let me have a perm based on the fact that I was using curling tongs every day (oh my goodness! everything I say is making me feel ancient ?) which would do more damage to my hair than a perm in the long term.  I loved it! And many more followed!

Most of you will know that I have enhanced the colour on a regular basis too, usually with some blonde, occasionally I have had it darker, but mostly blond. When it started growing back brown loads of people asked me if that was my natural colour before the chemo hair loss.  I have to say I don’t really know, it is such a long time since I had my natural colour…

The thing is that unlike having a perm on already styled hair that gives the ‘look’ instantly, I am watching mine grow and the curl develop with the length.  Being particularly conscious of not using chemicals and artificial things both inside and on my body these days, I don’t like to use too much product but the length has now reached a thin line between curl and bouffant! If I use a load of curl defining mousse, I get curls but as soon as I touch it or if I don’t use anything I quickly become ‘Pam the librarian’ no offence to Pams or Librarians but that’s not really a look I’m going for!  Throw in the cluster of grey on my temple and I’m seeing an old lady in the mirror so, I decided to do something about it.

I bought a 100% organic and chemical free herbal hair colour – how bad could it be?!

Me: Babe, would you colour my hair for me if I got a kit?

Phil: I’d give it a go

Me: Cool! Let’s do it now, it has to be left on for 3 hours

Phil: 3 hours?!

Me: yes.  Here’s the kit, you read it while I wash my hair

Phil: Sure, I had nothing better to do…

half an hour later

Me: do you think it smells a bit like manure?

Phil: I think it smells a lot like manure, now let me get this shower cap over it to keep the smell in!

I’m quite happy with it although I think I might go for a slightly lighter shade next time… I’ll let you see what you think.

Talk to you soon

lots of love Mand xxx

BEFORE:

DURING:

AFTER:

The instructions say that the colour will develop and the green tinge will fade within a few days!!!